Are you sure your child isn’t playing?
Play can be defined as a behaviour that includes characteristics like voluntary participation, enjoyment, motivation, imagination, and a focus on the process rather than the final outcome. The more an activity shows these traits, the more it can be considered play. But here’s the thing: it’s often the observer (that’s us grown-ups!) who decides whether a child is playing or not. And our view can be pretty biased! So, what does “playing” really mean for a young child? For preschoolers, play is something they choose freely and have control over. And guess what? They don’t always think of it as “fun”! So if it doesn’t look like play to you, it doesn’t mean your child isn’t fully engaged in their own playful world. 😉
And don’t forget: little ones often love turning everyday objects into playthings. It’s something you’ll often see during their exploratory phase — and in children bursting with creativity! Toys are simply tools — wonderful supports to spark, nourish, and enrich play. Children can use them as intended by the manufacturer… or in completely different, creative ways!
What might be stopping your child from playing with their toys?
- Not enough time to play: Experts recommend giving children at least one hour a day of unstructured, free play. Some even suggest they need several one- to two-hour blocks per day to really settle into deep, meaningful play.
- Needing your presence: Sometimes children need you to help them get into the rhythm of play, to encourage, reassure, or even guide them in understanding how a toy or plaything works.
- Out-of-sight toys: Playthings that are packed away or hard to reach are easily forgotten. You can help by creating a child-friendly setup — open shelves, unwrapped toys, and cosy play space in their room or even in the living room where family life happens.
- Too many toys! A 2017 study found that the average family home had 132 visible toys 😱 That’s overwhelming! Experts agree that limiting the number of toys accessible at any one time helps children focus and play more meaningfully. But how many is ideal? A study by Alexia Metz and colleagues at the University of Toledo found that toddlers played longer and more creatively when given just 4 toys. ✅ So what can you do? You can rotate toys yourself — or go eco-friendly and stress-free by borrowing from a plaything library.
Does your child have the "right" toys?
The toy market can feel overwhelming! 😵 Ads often target children by promoting plastic toys with the latest trendy characters — the kind that, at best, spark a passive reaction rather than active, engaged play. So… how about a little toy detox? 😈 Playthings that truly benefit your child should be:
- Toys that support development and creativity. Say goodbye to that one-button toy playing the same jingle over and over. If it doesn’t promote imagination, learning, or interaction, it’s not adding much. Play is how children explore and understand the world — let’s give them the tools to do that meaningfully.
- Toys that match your child’s developmental stage. 🎯 Too hard and they’ll feel frustrated or scared. Too easy and they’ll lose interest. The right toy challenges and inspires, without overwhelming.
- Varied and spark your child’s curiosity ✨ — that’s the key to a rich and inspiring play environment. As your child’s guide, try not to keep them locked into just one favourite theme. Instead, feed their imagination with something new, surprise them, and spark their natural drive to explore. You can also offer a variety of plaything types: open-ended toys that encourage creativity and pretend play, logic or puzzle games that boost cognitive development, rule-based games —like board games— to support social skills, toys that promote fine motor skills and hands-on manipulation, outdoor toys for burning energy and developing gross motor skills.
A rich, balanced play environment makes a big difference. ⚖️ Here are a few ideas to help:
- Create categories in your child’s birthday wishlist to help balance play types and themes.
- Swap toys with friends or cousins of similar ages. It teaches kids to care for others’ things — and keeps things interesting!
- Join a toy library! Renting instead of buying keeps clutter down and variety up. My own educational plaything library, Lil’ Discoveries, offers ready-to-play themed boxes with a rotation after 2 months of play — the perfect mix of learning and fun. If you’re in the Netherlands, come and have a look to my offer here 👀
